Over the years, Cans & Megabus has been inundated with fan mail from thousands all over the globe. The majority of which, naturally, have been lavishing praise upon the poetic prose that is weaved over 500 words every week and questioning how someone so devilishly handsome, devastatingly charming and insatiably good at juggling stays incredibly humble.
However, Sunderland find themselves in a real mess right now and Cans & Megabus feels it’s only necessary that we delve into our bulging mail bag and pick out some of your letters and give The Lads a boost going into the play-offs.
Our first letter comes from Archibald of Northumberland, who writes that “he has been following The Lads since 1924 and has had a season ticket for the past 95 years”. He goes on to say that he remembers munching on a lump of coal at the Fulwell End while watching Ernie England score from 75 yards out despite only having one leg. He continues this for a further three pages before concluding that we should rehire Peter Reid and Bobby Saxton to really show the likes of Josh Scowen what passion is.
Thanks Archie!
Our second letter comes from Rylan of Seaburn Amusements, who says that the one man that can really salvage our season is Dylan McGeouch and that it was “a travesty we continue to let players of his calibre slip through his fingers”. He continues that Lee Johnson should be given time “contrary to his statements on Twitter” and that other supporters should bookmark his tactics blog and agree with every opinion he has or risk “holding the club back”. He ends by saying the club should serve “pink slices and Double Maxim” in the concourse, although “only idiots” would buy it.
Keep them coming Rylan!
As always, we appreciate every letter sent into us here at Cans & Megabus and we try to get through as many as we can… even the less flattering ones! Anyway, thankfully you’ll never have to read one of these again and we’ll all be going back to stadiums watching The Lads lose to Cambridge United.
How To Recreate the Home Park Experience?
Home Park is absolutely thousands away so set your alarm for midnight and then go and stand in a car park waiting for a bus. Then, I dunno, eat a pasty or something?
Does This Place Have Any Good Brews?
All your big talk of drinking Stella in the rain, the novelty is wearing off now, isn’t it? You don’t really fancy sitting on an uncovered bench outside the Howard Arms as you choke down a Foster’s in the freezing cold, do you? Luckily, your friendly Cans & Megabus pal has found you a distinctively Plymouth beer for you to drink in the comfort of your own home.
If you enjoy that sweet combo of beer and bread, then brother, you are going to love Roam Brewing. Truly indulge by chomping down of their light and flaky croissants with ten cans of their delectable Double Sunday 8% DIPA.
Did You Know?
You thought the game of petanque – you know, that game where French people stand around and chuck metal balls about and smoke – was invented in France, didn’t you? Wrong. It was first played on Plymouth Hoe in 1912, just days before the sinking of the Titanic. Were those two things related? Who’s to say but, yes.
Legend has it that the captain of the SS Titanic was so infuriated at losing the inaugural game of petanque that he purposely drove the luxury cruise liner into that iceberg to teach everyone a lesson. A noble man.
Tom Walsh
