I return to you having disappeared from your footballing podcast platforms sometime back in August, and I can almost hear the groaning and slamming of doors from some of you at the mere sight of my name on this article.
I wouldn’t worry too much, to be honest, I’m not making a grand return a la Jonny Evans for his second loan spell. Think of it more as Danny Graham and this article his goal in a behind-closed-doors win over Aston Villa U21s.
Sitting fourth in the table it would be remiss of me to not pass comment on a season that warrants praise from even the most cynical of quarters. What are you looking at me like that for?
Flick back to the summer; Michael Beale was a distant memory, the 2023/24 season largely a shambles, Mike Dodds was heading for his latest bout of therapy to rid him of the memory of having to manage the first team again, and we didn’t have a manager.
Will Still was the name on everyone’s lips, despite it not looking particularly likely nor exceptionally reassuring. His famous period of Reims having to pay a fine for each game he managed was consigned to the Twitter vault alongside the 1963 Boxing Day results, and in reality, he’d won two of his last 14 games and left the club.
That said, the manager situation at Sunderland was becoming somewhat farcical and it wasn’t until June 22nd when that man absolutely everyone had been talking about, was unveiled as the new head coach. That man? Regis Le Bris of course. No, me neither. He’d just relegated Lorient to Ligue 2 but the signs apparently were encouraging, particularly regarding his work with young players. Okay then fine, welcome aboard. I think to be honest I was past caring at this point.
A season of mediocrity beckoned in my mind, the striker situation was still not resolved, and a few additions aside the squad wasn’t up to it. Another occasion where I turned out to be absolutely spot on. Pre-season was mixed and culminated in a bizarre match with Marseille which was played at Bradford. It makes sense.
Anyway, the season started and we won 2–0 at Cardiff, hammered Sheffield Wednesday and impressively defeated Burnley at the Stadium of Light. Things were negated slightly — we were unbeaten, yet to concede a goal and top of the league but everyone knew we were going to lose Jack Clarke. Losing him to Ipswich for thirty quid was quite galling, and though Romaine Mundle had started the season on fire, he was never going to be able to keep it up.
Turns out he was actually. Some really great performances from the wide man saw us return to the top of the table after a blip, and while he would tail off, his injury against Coventry would come at a bad time as we went six without a win. Another winger gone? Not to worry, Tommy Watson was ready to come in — you what? Oh for fu…
Having bagged two against Stoke, Watson became the latest to succumb to injury. What happens now? Admirably, for all I have criticised him, Eliezer Mayenda went out wide and performed well, but was guilty of some bad misses over the festive campaign. It’s at this point we must mention Ian Poveda. A three-year deal? We must trigger the option for a further year as soon as possible.
In uncharted territory, there’s more praise to be dished out. Jobe looks increasingly a Premier League player, and to be fair, I think even if we do go up hanging on to him could be impossible. A joy to watch, his ability to take three players out of a game with the drop of a shoulder is extraordinary and really quite embarrassing for the opposition. Chris Rigg defies belief at 17, and Dan Neil looks like a seasoned Championship midfielder at 23 years old. It’s exciting, yet worrying — we could lose all of them at the drop of a hat.
Chris Mepham was exactly the signing we needed at centre half, a position void of experience since the unceremonious booting out of Danny Batth, and alongside him, Dan Ballard can learn and grow. Who else can I praise in defence, particularly at centre half? Nope, no one is coming to mind. There’s a name there but I’ve forgotten it! What are the chances, eh?
We’re four points off the top two with over half the season gone and even the most optimistic (stupid) of you did not expect this. You can tell me all you like about how you’d watched the Italian Third Division and that this guy has the most pre-assists the Georgian Cup has ever seen but you just haven’t. You didn’t have a clue about how the season was going to go because no one did. It could have been a total disaster — it hasn’t been, it’s been great.
What it is though, is a huge opportunity. We’ve had one of these before, just two years ago. Tony Mowbray was the backing of the board in January away from taking us to the Premier League. A squad begging for reinforcements didn’t get them, in an act of self-sabotage that still saw the big man take us to the play-offs without any defenders or strikers.
Mr Speakman seems to have learned from this, or at least I hope so. Enzo Le Fee is exciting, while other names linked indicate they are going to give this a real go. As we’ve said before, you can’t choose when to go up. Cries after the last failed play-off campaign of ‘“we’re better off going up next year” were laughable, not least because we nearly got relegated.
We need a centre forward still. This isn’t the same old rhetoric, but it’ll be the difference I think. I’m not sure who we should sign, but that isn’t my job is it? Neither is whinging about everything they do either I suppose, but hey.
Will we go up? Oooo I’m very cynical as you know, Ted. Well, we will finish in the top six. Even I can’t see that not happening, surely? I honestly think stay in touch just see what happens. We can beat anyone at home, and we really should have just taken three points at Burnley. Two penalties missed, you don’t get opportunities like that often. Other teams will drop points and for all Leeds will likely win the league, no one anticipated Hull pegging them back.
Ultimately, we need to win games against the teams in mid-table and the bottom half and steal what we can from those above us. Sunderland are the outsiders in the top four, and that suits us, I think. Our ability to go that little bit under the radar while Don Goodman and Andy Hinchcliffe tug themselves daft over everyone else is a positive for us.
It’ll go right to the wire. Home form will be key, and we have some kind games on home turf coming up. Win them and worry about everything else after, I guess. The rest of January off the pitch is vital; additions are needed while we need to ensure we don’t lose anyone we don’t want to. Strengthening is key and do it well, we’ve more than half a chance.
Yes, it is me who has written this. I’ve not died and had James Reay step in under my name. Personally, by the way, I am fine, for the one person I believe has asked. You should be thanking me if anything, for changing the fortunes of the football club by not doing the podcast anymore.
Seriously (nah but seriously), I might pop back on before the end of the season (If there’s a ‘you fucking won’t’ edit here, have it known that I preempted it) (bugger – Ed). And if I do, expect a winless run to follow. Hey don’t blame me, I don’t work for the BBC (well, clearly – Ed)
That’s all for now I reckon. No doubt we’ll lose to Derby and Plymouth, get walloped off Boro and normal service will be resumed. It’s my birthday soon, come buy me a pint — or three and a half hot dogs.
All the best.
